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In Conversation with Dr Latife Eskesan
Dr Latife Eskisan has extensive experience working as a Clinical Psychologist in an Autism diagnostic service where she supported the assessment process and provided post-diagnostic support to families.
In this video, she gives us three top tips for helping with anxiety in autistic children.
In Conversation with Latife
Hi, I’m a clinical psychologist working at Autism Clinic London. Today I want to talk to you about something that comes up in almost every conversation I have with families – anxiety. If your child is autistic and struggles with anxiety, you are absolutely not alone. It’s one of the most common co-occurring experiences for autistic children and young people, and there’s a lot that you as a parent, can do to help.
So why is anxiety so common for autistic children? There are a few really important reasons. First, think about how much of everyday life depends on predicting what’s going to happen next. For many autistic children, the world can feel genuinely unpredictable. Changes to routine, unexpected sensory experiences, social situations where the rules aren’t clear. When your brain is working hard to process and make sense of all that incoming information, it makes sense that your system stays on high alert.
Secondly, sensory differences play a huge role. Environments that might feel perfectly manageable to neurotypical people. A busy supermarket, for instance, or a noisy classroom can be genuinely overwhelming for autistic children, and over time, even anticipating those environments can trigger anxiety.
Lastly, many autistic children and young people have had repeated experiences of things going wrong socially, or being misunderstood, or even feeling different from their peers. Those experiences build up, and they teach a child’s nervous system that the world isn’t always a safe place.
So how might anxiety present? Anxiety doesn’t always look the way we expect it to. Especially in autistic children, and it can look very different in each child. It’s not always a child saying ‘I feel worried’. You might see increased rigidity around routines and need for things to be done in a very specific way, and real distress when that doesn’t happen.
That need for sameness is often an anxiety strategy, a way for autistic children to manage the distress that comes along. Some children become more controlling of their environment, for instance, or the people around them, because controlling the external world is one way of managing their internal distress. You might also see avoidance, refusing to go to school or not wanting to attend parties or clubs or activities they once used to enjoy.
And for some children, anxiety shows up physically, such as tummy aches, headaches, difficulty sleeping or changes in eating. The key message here is if your child’s behaviour has changed or feels challenging, it’s always worth asking. Could anxiety be underneath this.
So what can you do to help? I want to share a few practical strategies with you. First, validate when your child is anxious, the most powerful thing you can do is let them know that their feelings make sense. Something as simple as ‘I can see this feels really hard for you’ goes a long way. We want to avoid jumping straight into reassurance, like ‘It’ll be fine’ because from your child’s perspective, it doesn’t feel fine. And that mismatch can make them feel more alone.
Second, make the invisible visible. Many autistic children benefit from being able to see what’s coming. Visual timetables, social stories and simply talking through what’s going to happen step by step can reduce uncertainty and bring anxiety levels down before they spike.
Lastly, create a sensory safety plan to work with your child to figure out what helps their body feel calmer. That might be noise-cancelling headphones, a favourite textured object, a quiet space they can retreat to or movement. Jumping. Swimming. Deep pressure. These aren’t rewards or luxuries. They’re genuine regulation tools.
Another helpful strategy is watching your own response. Children are incredibly attuned to the emotional states of the adults around them. If you stay calm and regulated, even when things are difficult, that really helps your child’s nervous system settle too. This isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being a steady presence.
Lastly, reduce demands during high anxiety periods. If your child is going through a particularly anxious time, it’s okay to temporarily lower expectations. That might mean a lighter homework load, fewer social commitments, or more downtime.
If anxiety is significantly impacting your child’s daily life, if they’re missing school or if family life feels really strained, please do reach out to us and we’d be more than happy to help.
Thank you so much for watching and I hope this is helpful.
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FAQs
How long is the wait time for a children's private autism assessment?
For private assessments, we aim to arrange a pre-assessment with a Specialist Doctor within 72 hours. If a full autism assessment is recommended, all appointments are typically completed within 4 weeks. Some delays may occur for example if the educational placement is closed during the holiday period. A comprehensive report, including a diagnosis where appropriate, is usually delivered within 10 days of your final appointment.
If you are referred through your NHS Trust, timelines are similar, although this can vary depending on local demand.
Do I need a GP referral for a private autism assessment?
No, you do not need a GP referral to access our private autism assessment service. Your first step is a consultation with one of our Specialist Doctors, all of whom also work within the NHS. They will discuss your child’s needs, development, and any concerns you or their school may have. If appropriate, you will be offered a short video consultation to review your child’s needs in more detail and decide whether to proceed with a full assessment.
What is included in a private autism assessment?
A private autism assessment at Autism Clinic London includes a detailed developmental history, clinical observations, and a structured diagnostic ADOS assessment. Input from parents, caregivers, and educational placements may also be included to ensure a complete understanding of your child’s needs. All of our reports mirror those you would receive from an NHS assessment.
How much does a private autism assessment cost in the UK?
The cost of a private autism assessment varies depending on the provider and the complexity of the assessment. To compare costs from other providers our costs cover the initial consultation, full diagnostic assessment, and a detailed written report. Mostly, you will be charged over £2,000 with some private clinics charging up to £3,500. We work hard to deliver our assessments at a lower rate than most of the market without compromising on quality. For example, some providers will assess your child without meeting them face-to-face. We believe that for an assessment to be thorough, we have to see your child in person.
Is a private autism diagnosis recognised by the NHS and schools?
Yes, a private autism diagnosis carried out by Autism Clinic London is recognised by schools, the NHS and local authorities. All our assessments are carried out by our multi-disciplinary team who follow NICE guidelines.
Many schools and local authorities accept private reports to support EHCP applications and access to support services.
Do you do assessments for ADHD?
Although our clinicians do carry out ADHD assessments in their NHS practice, we do not currently offer ADHD assessments at Autism Clinic London. Our Autism Assessments do include a comprehensive report and will highlight if there are possible ADHD concerns, which can then be explored in future by your child’s local NHS trust or by another provider.
What age can a child be diagnosed with autism?
Children can be assessed for autism from around 18 months onwards. Early diagnosis can help children access the right support sooner, improving long-term outcomes. We see children aged between 2 and 14 years.
What are the signs that my child may need an autism assessment?
How accurate is a private autism assessment?
Private autism assessments are highly accurate when conducted by experienced clinicians using evidence-based diagnostic tools and NICE guidelines. The quality of the assessment depends on the expertise of the professionals involved and the thoroughness of the process. We are regulated, inspected and rated by CQC which ensures that you can depend on the quality of our assessments.
What happens after an autism diagnosis?
Can adults get a private autism assessment too?
Yes, many private services offer autism assessments for adults as well as children. The process is similar but tailored to adult experiences, including work, relationships, and mental health history. We are a specialist clinic that only assesses children.
Is a private autism assessment faster than the NHS?
Yes, private assessments are significantly faster. While NHS waiting lists can often exceed 12–24 months, a private assessment at Autism Clinic London will typically be completed within four weeks.
Will schools accept a private autism assessment report?
Schools should accept private autism assessment reports, particularly when completed by qualified clinicians who follow NICE guidelines. These reports can be used to support SEN planning and requests for additional support.
Can I use a private diagnosis to apply for an EHCP?
Yes, a private diagnosis can support an Education, Health and Care Plan (EHCP) application. The report provides professional evidence of your child’s needs and recommended support.
What is the difference between screening and a full autism assessment?
A screening is an initial check to see whether autism may be present, while a full assessment is a comprehensive diagnostic process that can lead to a formal diagnosis. If you are concerned that your child has signs of Autism, please contact us and we can arrange an initial assessment in the first instance.
Do you offer online only autism assessments?
Some parts of the assessment process, such as initial consultations and diagnostic interviews with parent or carer, can be carried out online. However, a full diagnostic assessment will require in-person observation. Other providers may offer fully virtual assessments but such assessments do not meet our standards.
Why is an autism diagnosis important?
An autism diagnosis helps individuals and families understand their experiences, access appropriate support, and make informed decisions about education, healthcare, and daily life.
Does an autism diagnosis change anything?
A diagnosis doesn’t change who your child is, but it can open doors to support, reduce uncertainty, and provide clarity for families and professionals. Once you have a confirmed diagnosis, you can also access appropriate and targeted post-diagnostic care, which can help day-to-day life enormously.
Can a diagnosis help at school?
Yes, a diagnosis can help schools better understand your child’s needs and provide appropriate support, accommodations, and learning strategies. It can help inform an EHCP and a more complete approach to your child's educational needs.
